Is this a good thesis statement for an essay titled "dress codes in schools"? If not, could you please help in reconstructing as it is for a final paper?

Question

Thanks

While there may be opposition from students and parents, dress codes should be enforced in schools as it encourages discipline among students.

Answer 1

Yes, that is an excellent thesis. Now give three ways it encourages discipline.

Another possibility would be that it stresses student equality.

Answer 2

Thank you very much for the feedback.

Answer 3

I agree with Guru that it's an excellent thesis. However, you have a pronoun reference problem. Change "it encourages" to "they encourage" as you're referring to "dress codes" (plural).

While there may be opposition from students and parents, dress codes should be enforced in schools as THEY ENCOURAGE discipline among students.

Answer 4

I'll make the changes now, thank you Ms. Sue