I'm writing an essay on the topic " Contributing to the community" and I was wondering what you guy think if I start my first sentence like this.

Everyone in their life had made some world-shattering contributions to the community.These significant additions help us determine our world and destiny.

-If there anything you think I should add/change, please do tell me. Thanks

1 answer

Faulty pronoun. Everyone is singular. Their is plural and needs a plural antecedent.

I don't think contributing to a community is world-shaking.

"determine our world and destiny" is too vague.

Please try again.