Question

I tried to express more feelings in this one.

I am stuck in a chimney, and am feeling really weak, My whole body is injured with severe burns. My health is worsening as each moment passes. The pain really hurts, I want to stay back and earn a profit for my parents, I need to live for them, but I can't. I wish I could meet them for the last time, My time is up.

Answer 1

This is sooo much better. The only thing I would change would be the last sentence. I would say, I think my time is up.

Answer 2

thank you so much GuruBlue:-)