My fear:

Question

I'm sitting out here hoping and moping
If only the rain
Got rid of the pain
And me being here would get rid of my fear
My fear of cheer
Some drown it in beer
It may seem queer but its another fear
'Cuz I actually want a career
And that wont happen if it got drowned in bee

Hoiw does this poem sound?? I have that and another one and I am submiting it to the school blog and I wanted some comments.

Darling of Darkness:

Darling of Darkness
Calling my name
Making me sane
Daring of Darkness
Showers in shame
Yet she can't be tamed

poease remember these are written by a 12 year old. thanks for any and all comments. ☺♦☻

Answer 1

Thanks to all who read.... I meant "How" not "Hiow" sorry.

Answer 2

I'm far from a poetry critic, but I think these poems are great!

Answer 3

Thanks. I get them in the school blog, but my problem is I don't know if these are good enough...

Answer 4

this was beautiful.

Answer 5

thanks. that really gave me some confidence about them........ ☺☻♥