I'm writing a DBQ Essay on Civil War and Reconstruction. The major question is What led the Southern states to secede from the Union in 1860 and 1861? My question is can i include as a thesis to state the civil war has negative effects than positive effects on the economy and people.

Question

Ok, here is my intro.

Thousands of people in the major war of history which is the Civil War had died due to states rights. Southern States believed that they had the right to determine their own priorities and this led to secession. They didn’t want to be controlled or ruled by the Northerners who also opposed slavery. A main part of Southern’s economy was based on slavery, agricultural and labor. Therefore, they felt the Northerners were dictators and taking away their rights. As a result, Abraham Lincoln believed the priorities of the states were less important than the priorities of the nation. His point of view was unity is the best way to rule a nation so it can survive but there were many differences between the North and the South. Many compromises would have to be made in order to satisfy both the North and South but sooner or later the nation won’t be able to handle it and a crisis will begin and the whole nation will corrupt. Although there were more negative effects than positive effects which prove how slavery will take a long time to end due to the southern states desiring slavery to boost their economy which would lead to secession.

I want to add more but how does this sound? Should i fix anything about it?

Answer 1

It seems to me that all this is very confusing.

An introduction should lead the past and surroundings to the thesis. What is all this nonsense about Lincoln have to do with your thesis?

In my prior post, I gave you a link to the reasons for the Civil war. Did you read that?
Secondly, what do you mean the main idea is what caused the war? What does that have to do with your thesis?

What you have written, at least to me, is very confusing, and not helping you develop a clear thesis.

Answer 2

Okay, then im sorry if i did this wrong but im just trying to see what I can do. I'm not perfect at this, ok but atleast im trying and not giving up. I stil appreciate it for you answering my question.

Therefore, your trying to state i should include the causes of the civil war and how it led up to secession

Answer 3

Thousands of people in the major war of history, known as the "Civil War" had died due to states rights. Southern States believed that they had the right to determine their own priorities and this led to secession. They didn’t want to be controlled or ruled by the Northerners who also opposed slavery. A main part of Southernism economy was based on slavery, agriculture and labor. Therefore, they felt the Northerners were dictators, and moreover taking away their rights. As a result, Abraham Lincoln believed the priorities of the states were less important than the priorities of the nation. His point of view was unity is the best way to rule a nation so it can survive but there were many differences between the North and the South. Many compromises would have to be made in order to satisfy both the North and South but sooner or later the nation won’t be able to handle it and a crisis will begin and the whole nation will corrupt. Although there were more negative effects than positive effects which proved how slavery would take a long time to end due to the southern states desiring slavery to boost their economy; which would lead to secession.

I changed it a little bit. The last sentence is pretty long, so you may want to shorten it out. Your paragraph is very good. You could add more in this, but I think it's fine.

Answer 4

Ok, thanks a lot. Happy Holidays

And Happy Holidays to you Bob

Answer 5

yeah, happy holidays. You should listen to bobpursely and do your theseis his way. I actually never read your "assignment" given to you. I just read your paragraph randomly. Sorry for giving you wrong info.