Having an alcoholic parent was the crisis in our family. My father began drinking when he was young in social gatherings. Once he married my mother he began to drink more often. My father and mother did not have good communication skills during their marriage. My dad had a passive communication style and my mother had an aggressive communication style. My father concealed his feelings and used alcohol in order to cope with his feelings. My mother did not know how to deal with his drinking in a more constructive manner and instead she would accuse him of making her unhappy. She used many negative forms of communication, for instance, she spent more time pointing out my father’s flaws instead of his good qualities. Both my mother’s communication and my father’s drinking problem pushed both of them away from developing intimacy in their relationship. As the years went by their relationship was becoming more challenging for the both of them and so they decided to separate after ten years of marriage.

Question

My parents could have prevented this crisis by taking classes that helped them improve their communication skills before they got married. Their lack of communication skills is what caused their marriage to fail in the first place. If they both would have taken classes that taught them to communicate in an assertive manner, then both of my parents would have gotten their needs met in a more productive manner. My father would have been able to express his feelings and he wouldn’t have used alcohol to cope with his emotions. My mother could have also benefited from these classes because she would have learned to use more positive forms of communication in order for her to have her needs met.
My mother also could have prevented this crisis by having professionals conduct a family intervention before my father’s addiction progress further. My father also could have gone to rehab in order to get help from professionals who know ways of helping him get out of his additions. My parents also could have benefited attending groups that helped them both learn ways of improving their self-esteem. They both could have attended church and participate in the church activities that are geared towards married couples. They could have learned ways of approaching conflicts in a healthier manner by the help and support from other married couples. My parents also could have gone to other support groups for instance, my father could have gone to Alcoholic Anonymous meetings and my mother could have gone to Alanon meetings. These self-help groups could have helped them to not feel alone or isolated. If my parents would have used any of these tools, there marriage could have had a higher chance of surviving.

Thanks again!

Answer 1

Having an alcoholic parent was the crisis in our family. My father began drinking when he was young in social gatherings. Once he married my mother he began to drink more often. My father and mother did not have good communication skills during their marriage. My dad had a passive communication style and my mother had an aggressive communication style. My father concealed his feelings and used alcohol in order to cope with his feelings. My mother did not know how to deal with his drinking in a more constructive manner and instead she would accuse him of making her unhappy. She used many negative forms of communication, for instance, she spent more time pointing out my father’s flaws instead of his good qualities. Both my mother’s communication and my father’s drinking problem pushed both of them away from developing intimacy in their relationship. As the years went by their relationship was becoming more challenging for the both of them and so they decided to separate after ten years of marriage.
Add commas where needed (after introductory clauses/phrases, in compound sentences, etc.); fix the run-on; figure out how NOT to have "his feelings" twice in the same sentence

My parents could have prevented this crisis by taking classes that helped them improve their communication skills before they got married. Their lack of communication skills is what caused their marriage to fail in the first place. If they both had taken classes that taught them to communicate in an assertive manner, then both of my parents would have gotten their needs met in a more productive manner. My father would have been able to express his feelings and he wouldn’t have used alcohol to cope with his emotions. My mother could have also benefited from these classes because she would have learned to use more positive forms of communication in order for her to have her needs met. Comma uses; verb tense sequence in "if...then" types of sentences (too many "would have" expressions where they are not accurate)

My mother also could have prevented this crisis by having professionals conduct a family intervention before my father’s addiction progress further. My father also could have gone to rehab in order to get help from professionals who know ways of helping him get out of<~~wording? his additions<~~???. My parents also could have benefited attending groups that helped them both learn ways of improving their self-esteem. They both could have attended church and participate in the church activities that are geared towards married couples. They could have learned ways of approaching conflicts in a healthier manner by the help and support from other married couples. My parents also could have gone to other support groups for instance, my father could have gone to Alcoholic Anonymous meetings and my mother could have gone to Alanon meetings. These self-help groups could have helped them to not feel alone or isolated. If my parents had used any of these tools, there<~~??? marriage could have had a higher chance of surviving. Comma uses; verb tense sequencing; again, too many uses of "could have" in here -- work on variety.

Answer 2

Comma uses: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/commas.htm

Verb tense sequencing: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/verbs.htm#sequence

Run-ons: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/runons.htm

Answer 3

Two additional things:

1. DO NOT WAIT until the last minute to post proofreading requests.

2. To quote PsyDAG: "In the future, if nobody is available to proofread your work, you can do this yourself. After writing your material, put it aside for a day — at least several hours. (This breaks mental sets you might have that keep you from noticing problems.) Then read it aloud as if you were reading someone else's work. (Reading aloud slows down your reading, so you are less likely to skip over problems.)

"If your reading goes smoothly, that is fine. However, wherever you 'stumble' in your reading, other persons are likely to have a problem in reading your material. Those 'stumbles' indicate areas that need revising.

"Once you have made your revisions, repeat the process above. Good papers often require many drafts."