give me a paragraph of roasts

Answer 1

You're like a firework on the 4th of July - all hype and excitement, but ultimately ending in disappointment. Your personality is as bland as watered-down soup, and your fashion sense is stuck in the 90s, just like your sense of humor. Your intelligence is as dull as a rusty blade, and your attempts at socializing are as awkward as a cat wearing a ball gown. You're about as useful as a screen door on a submarine, and as memorable as last week's leftovers. In other words, you're about as appealing as a root canal without anesthesia.