A series of Lies Poem

Question

A Tell a series of lies about yourself
B.Begin with the line, “I wish I were not so...”
C.End the poem with an “if” section.

Here is an example:
I wish I were not so brilliant.
My incredible mind overflows with ideas
Weighing me down with knowledge.
I am so smart I wrote volumes 4,8, and 16
Of the Encyclopedia Brittanica.
I’ve read every book in the Phoenix Library
And for recreation
I decipher Mayan hieroglyphics.
If a car were to run over me,
The gutters could be filled with learning
And bits of my brain would shine in the street
Like the morning sun.

Here is mine:

I wish I were not so despicable.
My socks leak with sweat and drool drips down my lips, making its way down my chin. Playing pranks on my teachers’ everyday; I get detention afterschool. Hopping my way down home, I stop to peek in windows of strangers. They notice me, and call the police. I bribe the police with money and am safe. My evil mind leads me to disastrous adventures which I enjoy experiencing. Knocking down kids at school, makes me feel amused. It’s like being addicted to drugs; I live for catastrophes. If a doctor were to check my heart, he would experience an attack on himself.

Please tell me if this looks good, and what I can add in it to make look good if it's not. Thank you very much for all your help:-)

Answer 1

Clever! What about at the end "experience an attack himself?"

Sra