The underlying cause of the northern Uganda rebellion is ethnic conflict. Comparable to what we have recently learned many ethnic groups like the Acholi frequently dislike each other due to one ethnic group’s economic exploitation or political domination of another.
Put a comma after "learned". Use "one another" instead of "each other" and "the other" at the end of the sentence.
Joseph Kony, leader of the LRA claims to be fighting for the rights of the Acholi peoples.
Put a comma after LRA.
According to an article in BBC news, Uganda’s ethic differences have run mainly along geographical divisions between north and south (BBC 2007). The Acholi tribe coexists within the northern boundaries of Uganda; however, Acholi is a minority group among the entire population.
coexists with whom?
The southern region of Uganda consists of Bantu speaking ethnic groups; it is also the region where power and wealth is kept (BBC 2007). Consequently, Acholi are exposed to unequal economic resource and are subjected to political discrimination.
The underlying cause of the northern Uganda rebellion is ethnic conflict. Comparable to what we have recently learned many ethnic groups like the Acholi frequently dislike each other due to one ethnic group’s economic exploitation or political domination of another. Joseph Kony, leader of the LRA claims to be fighting for the rights of the Acholi peoples. According to an article in BBC news, Uganda’s ethic differences have run mainly along geographical divisions between north and south (BBC 2007). The Acholi tribe coexists within the northern boundaries of Uganda; however, Acholi is a minority group among the entire population. The southern region of Uganda consists of Bantu speaking ethnic groups; it is also the region where power and wealth is kept (BBC 2007). Consequently, Acholi are exposed to unequal economic resource and are subjected to political discrimination.
4 answers
Barbara Harff and Ted Robert Gurr authors of “Ethnic Conflict In World Politics”, describe “communal contenders” as an ethnic group in which its goal is to reach political power (28). Nearly all ethnic groups seek to have their own state and territorial boundaries. However, others like the Acholi want to demand their political power in order to preserve their identity. As portrayed in the documentary, Acholi are angry at their government. Disadvantaged communal contenders, in this case Acholi peoples live in relative poverty compared to that of the dominant groups in the south. As depicted in the documentary, Acholis’ face unequal economic and political power. The Ugandan government has overwhelmed Acholi economy by forcing them into displacement camps which has led them into deplorable conditions. As many as 800,000 people out of one million that live in the northern region of Uganda were put in displaced camps by the government (2003). This depravation has caused Acholi peoples to find their own means to preserve life, Uganda’s night commuters, are the example. Communal conflicts can result in a mobilized armed conflict, which can be led by unscrupulous leaders, like Joseph Kony (Harrf & Gurr 28). The LRA targeting civilians, the majority being their own tribe Acholi, and the government’s deficiency to defend the Acholi population has become a threat, not only, to Acholi’s identity as an ethnic group, but to its absolute existence.
can u help revise the above?
Barbara Harff and Ted Robert Gurr authors of “Ethnic Conflict In World Politics”, describe “communal contenders” as an ethnic group in which its goal is to reach political power (28).
put a comma after Gurr. Put a "the" before "goal" instead of "its".
Nearly all ethnic groups seek to have their own state and territorial boundaries. However, others like the Acholi want to demand their political power in order to preserve their identity.
delete "their" before political
As portrayed in the documentary, Acholi are angry at their government. Disadvantaged communal contenders, in this case Acholi peoples live in relative poverty compared to that of the dominant groups in the south.
put a comma after "peoples".
As depicted in the documentary, Acholis’ face unequal economic and political power.
delete this sentence, as it is repetitive.
The Ugandan government has overwhelmed Acholi economy by forcing them into displacement camps which has led them into deplorable conditions. As many as 800,000 people out of one million that live in the northern region of Uganda were put in displaced camps by the government (2003).
This depravation has caused Acholi peoples to find their own means to preserve life, Uganda’s night commuters, are the example.
check spelling of depravation. You do not need the "s" after people here. Put a semi-colon after "life"; remove the comma after commuters.
Communal conflicts can result in a mobilized armed conflict, which can be led by unscrupulous leaders, like Joseph Kony (Harrf & Gurr 28).
The LRA targeting civilians, the majority being their own tribe Acholi, and the government’s deficiency to defend the Acholi population has become a threat, not only, to Acholi’s identity as an ethnic group, but to its absolute existence.
the following is a more efficient way to phrase the last sentence - The LRA's targeting the Acholi and the government's inability to defend them has become a threat not only to the tribe's identity as an ethnic group but also to its absolute existence.
put a comma after Gurr. Put a "the" before "goal" instead of "its".
Nearly all ethnic groups seek to have their own state and territorial boundaries. However, others like the Acholi want to demand their political power in order to preserve their identity.
delete "their" before political
As portrayed in the documentary, Acholi are angry at their government. Disadvantaged communal contenders, in this case Acholi peoples live in relative poverty compared to that of the dominant groups in the south.
put a comma after "peoples".
As depicted in the documentary, Acholis’ face unequal economic and political power.
delete this sentence, as it is repetitive.
The Ugandan government has overwhelmed Acholi economy by forcing them into displacement camps which has led them into deplorable conditions. As many as 800,000 people out of one million that live in the northern region of Uganda were put in displaced camps by the government (2003).
This depravation has caused Acholi peoples to find their own means to preserve life, Uganda’s night commuters, are the example.
check spelling of depravation. You do not need the "s" after people here. Put a semi-colon after "life"; remove the comma after commuters.
Communal conflicts can result in a mobilized armed conflict, which can be led by unscrupulous leaders, like Joseph Kony (Harrf & Gurr 28).
The LRA targeting civilians, the majority being their own tribe Acholi, and the government’s deficiency to defend the Acholi population has become a threat, not only, to Acholi’s identity as an ethnic group, but to its absolute existence.
the following is a more efficient way to phrase the last sentence - The LRA's targeting the Acholi and the government's inability to defend them has become a threat not only to the tribe's identity as an ethnic group but also to its absolute existence.
2 answers