Asked by Madison

please read this poem and tell me how I can inprove it. Thanks!

Where have you been
I almost forgot you
Its been a year or so
Since I’ve seen you last
Why did you have to come back
I was trying to forget you
And forget what you did
Why bring back the bad memories
Can’t you just leave now
Like you did before
So I can try to forget you again
Isn’t it obvious I want you gone
This time when you leave
I want it to be for good
I don’t want to see you again
Just leave now
Just leave before I fall for you
Before I start in that terrible cycle again
I don’t want to be with you ever
So as you leave this time
And walk out that door
Don’t look back
Because I’ll have already gone
Answered by GuruBlue
Other than (perhaps) put in some punctuation... I think it is super.
Regarding punctuation... I think I would use dashes or a series of dots. instead of commmas or semi-colons... Just put a period at the end. The dashes/dots indicate (to me) a continuing thought...musing....
Answered by Madison
Like this??

Where have you been,
I almost forgot you.
Its been a year or so,
Since I’ve seen you last.
Why did you have to come back.
I was trying to forget you
And forget what you did.
Why bring back the bad memories.
Can’t you just leave now,
Like you did before.
So I can try to forget you again.
Isn’t it obvious I want you gone?
This time when you leave,
I want it to be for good.
I don’t want to see you again,
Just leave now.
Just leave before I fall for you.
Before I start in that terrible cycle again.
I don’t want to be with you ever.
So as you leave this time,
And walk out that door.
Don’t look back,
Because I’ll have already gone.
Answered by GuruBlue
Where have you been.....
I almost forgot you.
Its been a year or so
Since I’ve seen you last.
Why did you have to come back?
I was trying to forget you
And forget what you did.
Why bring back the bad memories...
Can’t you just leave now
Like you did before...
So I can try to forget you again.
Isn’t it obvious I want you gone?
This time when you leave
I want it to be for good.
I don’t want to see you again.
Just leave now.
Just leave before I fall for you...
Before I start in that terrible cycle again.
I don’t want to be with you ever.
So as you leave this time
And walk out that door,
Don’t look back.
I will have already gone.
Answered by Madison
Thanks! :P
Answered by GuruBlue
Welcome entirely =)
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