Asked by y912f

the level of excitement was getting higher and higher as the day went on.
it was just us 4 kids at home waiting anxiously for some news of the baby
the day seemed to stretch on forever, ... because there was nothing to do but wait
suddenly negative feelings started coming in my head
i started to think about what would happen if something went wrong
all of a sudden i realized that i was worrying about my mom more and more and the excitement started to slowly die away
Answered by y912f
my mind was very troubled at these depressing thougts.

yet i was getting more and more anxious, even irritated, to hear some news from my parents

my siblings weren't as unenthusiastic as i was

i tried to bring cheerful thoughts back into my mind

Answered by y912f
Ok. I was continuing to freewrite for my essay topic that i posted yesterday. (describe a person (even yourself) at a time of great emotion; for example, joy, anger, grief, etc.)

i think this is good enough, right?
i want to make an outline of how my essay will be organized so then i can start the actual writing. i would appreciate it if someone could please help me with that
thanks a lot
Answered by Sara
I just googled that and I found many many good outlines for essays.

I suggest you go onto google, and type in: outline for an essay.

Try out the first three on that search.
Answered by Ms. Sue
So far, so good. :-)

Answered by y912f
thank you both very much

this is a rough outline that i made to guide myself throughout the essay:

Outline

I. Introduction (thesis)
II. Second Paragraph (how the day began and how I was feeling)
III. Third Paragraph ( phone calls started coming in. feelings were changing)
IV. Fourth Paragraph (depressing feelings. Stress. Everybody waiting anxiously)
V. Conclusion (dad calls and we find out it’s a girl. How the day ends. Feelings)


is it alright? are there any changes at all needed?

now i just need to think of a good thesis statement
Answered by y912f
I. Introduction (thesis)
II. Second Paragraph (how the day began and how I was feeling)
III. Third Paragraph ( phone calls started coming in. feelings were changing)
IV. Fourth Paragraph (depressing feelings. Stress. Everybody waiting anxiously)
V. Conclusion (dad calls and we find out it’s a girl. How the day ends. Feelings)
Answered by y912f
why isn't it showing up?
Answered by Sara
yeah, the same thing was happening to me as well. I had made an outline for you but couldn't post it.
Answered by Ms. Sue
For some reason, this board won't copy outlines or material with bullets. If you'd like us to look at it, you'll need to type it here.


Answered by Sara
Oh, that's kind of strange because I had typed it myself, but still it wouldn't post.
Answered by y912f
I. Introduction (thesis, introduce topic)
II. Second Paragraph (how the day began and how i was feeling)
III. Third Paragraph (phone calls started coming in. feelings were changing.)
IV. Fourth Paragraph (depressing feelings. stress. everybody's waiting anxiously)
V. Conclusion (dad calls and we find out it's a girl. how the day ends. feelings)

Answered by Sara
thats good, just remember to add lots of supporting details in paragraphs 2,3 and 4.
Answered by Ms. Sue
Yes, that's a good outline.


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