Question

For my english class we have to write a one page essay about What is the most significant gift that we wish to give ourself this semester. I posted what I had yesterday and you responded back. I took your advice and changed my entire paper. I was wondering if it's better, what I should add or take out, and any grammar mistakes. I really appreciate your time and help.

What is the most significant gift that you wish to give yourself this semester?

The most significant gift that I wish to give myself this semester would be better writing skills because they will last forever. I have always been a pretty good writer, but my writing always seems to lack that wow factor. There is always room for improving because writing never goes away. Over the course of the semester, I want to learn how to make my writings the best that they can be. To help me reach my expectations I need to start on the paper the day that it's assigned instead of waiting until the night before it's due. I tend to sit at my computer and type whatever comes to my mind without doing a rough copy ahead of time. I have always had a problem with long sentences and using big words that people don't understand. To make my writings sound better I need to break my thoughts into shorter sentences so what I'm trying to say is clearly understood by the reader. Learning to use words that everyone understands will be a challenge but I don't want the reader to be distracted and lose interest in the rest of my writing. In my 1180 English class I lost most of my points for grammar. Learning different ways to improve my grammar will definitely make my writings sound a lot of better. I'm very determined to put everything that I have into this gift that I want to give myself so I can always say “ I can write like that”.

Answer 1

instead of rough copy say rough draft. Instead of alot of take out the of and just say alot better. Your paragraph is excellent and I may not be a teacher but I have a 3.75 GPA and I know alot about writing I write every single day practicly. If I was a teacher I would give your paragraph an A+

Answer 2

I like your improved essay! Fantastic!!

I'd use the word "writing" instead of "writings," though.

Start in by learning the basic comma uses -- and apply them to this paragraph!
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/commas.htm
[The Index at this website is fantastic; you should be able to find all grammar and writing topics you need help with.]

Read your paper aloud to someone -- or have that person read it aloud to you. You'll hear where you need to make corrections -- where the reader stumbles and has to reread anything.

Answer 3

Please, Alex -- it's "a lot" (not "alot").

http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/plague.htm
See #20.

Answer 4

oh sorry for the mistake "my bad"

Answer 5

No problem. The point is to learn new things!!