Question

i wrote a sonnet on winning, can some review and give additional ideas and changes. also help me with last stanza.

At times I wonder why I want to win
Maybe it is the thrill of beating them
Maybe a first prize medal or a shiny pin
I know I’d love to win a precious gem

I compete so I can win a prize
In a strong state of mind
So I can give someone a surprise
The future victory shined

You can only win if you think you can
When you think you can’t , you’ve already lost
Because the one who thinks they can is the best man
Since lack of courage comes at a cost

If you want to win, but you think you can’t

Answer 1

Be sure to READ CAREFULLY the information in the link that Ms. Sue sent you.

http://www.jiskha.com/display.cgi?id=1415899014

Count the number of lines you have.
Count the number of syllables per line.
Make sure the rhyme scheme is right.

Answer 2

is my rhyme scheme right

Answer 3

So far, yes ... but you're missing the 14th line.

Answer 4

how many syllables are in each line

Answer 5

Did you read the linked webpage Ms. Sue sent you? It's all very clearly explained in there.

http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/writing-a-sonnet.html

Answer 6

i am school and that site is blocked

Answer 7

<i>Here are the rules for writing a sonnet:

It must consist of 14 lines.

It must be written in iambic pentameter (duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH-duh-DUH).

It must be written in one of various standard rhyme schemes.

If you're writing the most familiar kind of sonnet, the Shakespearean, the rhyme scheme is this:

A
B
A
B

C
D
C
D

E
F
E
F

G
G

Every A rhymes with every A, every B rhymes with every B, and so forth. You'll notice this type of sonnet consists of three quatrains (that is, four consecutive lines of verse that make up a stanza or division of lines in a poem) and one couplet (two consecutive rhyming lines of verse).

Ah, but there's more to a sonnet than just the structure of it. A sonnet is also an argument — it builds up a certain way. And how it builds up is related to its metaphors and how it moves from one metaphor to the next. In a Shakespearean sonnet, the argument builds up like this:

First quatrain: An exposition of the main theme and main metaphor.

Second quatrain: Theme and metaphor extended or complicated; often, some imaginative example is given.

Third quatrain: Peripeteia (a twist or conflict), often introduced by a "but" (very often leading off the ninth line).

Couplet: Summarizes and leaves the reader with a new, concluding image.</i>

Answer 8

the teacher said i need 10 syllables per line do i have that requirement

Answer 9

Only in the first quatrain, which Ms. Sue wrote for you.

Second quatrain:

I compete so I can win a prize (9)
In a strong state of mind (6)
So I can give someone a surprise (9)
The future victory shined (7)

Count the syllables in the rest of your lines. What do you get?

Answer 10

8
9
11
9

10

is this right

Answer 11

You can on-ly win if you think you can (10)

When you think you can’t , you’ve al-rea-dy lost (10)

Be-cause the one who thinks they can is the best man (12)

Since lack of cou-rage comes at a cost (9)

If you want to win, but you think you can’t (10)

Answer 12

In addition, you need to make a syntax correction in this line:

Because the one who thinks they can is the best man

The words "one" and "man" are singular, but "they" is plural. How will you make them all singular? Or all plural?

Answer 13

thank you writeacher

Answer 14

You're welcome!

Answer 15

the ones who think they can

Answer 16

6 syllables