Use the Georgia Milestones Assessment System to score this Student essay out of 7 points

Question

Summer break has become a cherished tradition among most American schools, and is loved by students and teachers alike. Considering that students attend school from August through May with minimal breaks, most students look forward to summer as a time to break from routine, sleep in, and enjoy personal hobbies. For teachers, it gives them the opportunity to relax and recover from a hard year’s work. Therefore, schools should stick with a traditional schedule that includes summer break to give students the time to relax and teachers the time to prepare for the next school year.
For 180 days a year, students are required to attend school and adhere to a strict bell schedule. Summer break gives students the chance to refresh their minds and focus on spending time with friends and family. For two months out of the year, students can not stress about deadlines, bell schedules, and homework. Instead, they can engage their brains in more creative outlets, or give their brains a break completely. This may also be a time for many students to work to earn money or volunteer to boost their college resumes. Regardless of how the time is spent, it gives students the opportunity to do the things that they want to do.
Teachers are tasked with creating lesson plans and instructional materials for nine ten months out of the year. However, many teachers do not stop planning even over summer break. If teachers did not have summers, they would not have time to effectively transition from year-to-year. Teachers would release one set of students to pick up a whole new roster the following year. This would be even more complicated if teachers were required to move grade-levels or needed to switch school systems. Despite all of the work teachers put into the summer, they also deserve to have a break, too. Therefore, schools should maintain a traditional schedule to ensure they retain good teachers.
If schools switched to a year-round schedule, the teacher and student burnout from attending school non-stop would contribute to the growing mental health crisis in America. Without a break, teachers and students do not have the necessary time to recharge and prepare for the upcoming school year. Many professionals would argue that having school year round would help students retain what they learn from grade-level to grade-level. However, this could come at the expense of increased burnout and decreased graduation rates as students drop-out because they hate school. Considering teachers, without additional pay, many teachers would leave the profession because the workload has increased compared to a traditional school schedule. Overall, switching to a year-round schedule is a bad idea that would have many negative consequences.
In conclusion, to protect teachers’ and students’ mental health and well-being, school districts should not change to a year-round schedule because the consequences outweigh the benefits. Teachers deserve a break and time to plan for the upcoming school year without also having to manage a full class at the same time. Students also need a chance to step away from the classroom to recover from the previous school year and mentally prepare for the new year. Considering these factors, schools should maintain a traditional school schedule and never eliminate summer break.

Answer 1

To score the student essay using the Georgia Milestones Assessment System, we need to evaluate it against the criteria typically applied to essays in this program, which include:

1. Ideas and Content: The clarity and relevance of the thesis, development of the argument, and depth of ideas.
2. Organization: The structure of the essay, including effective introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
3. Style and Voice: The tone, engagement, and appropriateness of language for the audience.
4. Conventions: Grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, and spelling.

Scoring:

1. Ideas and Content (3 points):

   • The essay presents a clear thesis stating that schools should maintain a traditional schedule with a summer break due to the benefits for both students and teachers.
   • It explores different aspects such as mental health, planning for teachers, and personal growth for students.
   • The arguments are relevant and well-developed, though some could be expanded more thoroughly. Overall, it would score a 2.5 for the depth and clarity of ideas.

2. Organization (2 points):

   • The essay has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
   • Each paragraph focuses on a specific point, contributing to the overall argument.
   • While the organization is good, transitions could be a bit smoother, and the conclusion could reiterate the main points more effectively. It would earn 1.5 for organization.

3. Style and Voice (1 point):

   • The language is appropriate and clear, and the tone is consistent throughout the essay.
   • The voice is present, though it lacks a bit of diversity in sentence structure and vocabulary.
   • Overall, it would receive a 1 in this category.

4. Conventions (1 point):

   • The essay contains few grammatical errors, and the spelling is generally correct.
   • Sentence structures are mostly correct, but there are moments of repetition and some awkward phrasing.
   • Therefore, it would earn a 1 in conventions.

Total Score:

• Ideas and Content: 2.5
• Organization: 1.5
• Style and Voice: 1
• Conventions: 1
• Total = 6.0 out of a possible 7 points.

Final Score: 6 out of 7 points.

This student has made a strong argument supported by relevant examples, structured their essay well, and used mostly correct conventions, making it an effective piece of writing.