Your response is incredibly vague.
Of course, I definitely think that improvements were made in the working conditions for climbing boys.
Why "of course"?
What improvements have been made? Give lots of details.
I wouldn't assume that the governments just ran away from this situation, and did nothing about it; all together they must have done something to support these children and make their work easier.
Why would you not assume this?
"they must have done something" = ?? Such as ... what?
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/examples.htm
How and why you need to use details/examples to back up any statements you make.
http://aaweb.gallaudet.edu/CLAST/Tutorial_and_Instructional_Programs/English_Works/Writing/Essays.html
Whether you're writing a paragraph or an essay, these ideas are priceless.
http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/writeproc.html
Notice #3 on the list.
This question is also on the same source.
Do you think that this inquest led to improvements in the working conditions for climbing boys? Why or Why not?
Of course, I definitely think that improvements were made in the working conditions for climbing boys. I wouldn’t assume that the governments just ran away from this situation, and did nothing about it; all together they must have done something to support these children and make their work easier.
1 answer
2 answers