The feedback I would give to the 1st year student who wrote a bad essay

Answer 1

Dear [Student],

I wanted to take a moment to provide you with some feedback on the essay you submitted. While I appreciate the effort you put into the assignment, there are a few areas that could use improvement.

First and foremost, the essay lacked a clear thesis statement. It is important to clearly state your main argument or point of view at the beginning of your essay so that readers know what to expect. Additionally, the organization of your ideas was a bit confusing and disjointed, making it difficult to follow your line of reasoning.

Furthermore, the essay contained several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that distracted from your message. Remember to proofread your work carefully before submitting it to catch any mistakes.

I would also recommend doing more research on the topic to ensure that your arguments are well-supported and grounded in evidence. It is important to back up your claims with facts and examples to strengthen your argument and persuade your reader.

Overall, I encourage you to take this feedback constructively and use it as a learning opportunity to improve your writing skills. If you have any questions or need further guidance, please don't hesitate to reach out.

Best regards,

[Your Name]