I personally think the second sentence is better:
As he firmly held the root, Will drowned in complex thoughts, each one a little fragment that made him whole, when he first planted those tomato vines with his family.
This sentence flows better and creates a clearer image of Will's emotional experience while planting the tomato vines.
pick which one is better As he firmly held the root, Will drowned in complex thoughts when he first planted those tomato vines with his family, for they were little fragments that made him whole. or
As he firmly held the root, Will drowned in complex thoughts, each one a little fragment that made him whole, when he first planted those tomato vines with his family.
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