okay, I need to do a powerpoint for this career "computer animation"

Question

I need help writing a simple, short, punchy paragraph or list. Yet able to get the message across to the audience.

Origninal:

Most animators begin as studio runners and then progress to junior animation roles.
In 2D animation, you may begin work as an 'inbetweener', then progress to key framer. 3D animation has a more hierarchical structure: you start as a junior animator, then progress to senior animator after a few years' experience, and finally become design manager or art director. Senior roles involve more paperwork, managing and organizing staff, and generating new ideas.

Edit:

You begin as studio runners then progress to junior animation roles. After a few years' experience, you will progress to senior animator and finally become design manager or art director. Senior roles involve more paperwork, managing and organizing staff, and generating new ideas.

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Help please. Would this be good enough?
You may suggest alternatives or tips.
Thank you,

Answer 1

Add a comma after the first "runners" -- and the rest sounds fine.