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My cousin, Trump Is very mean to me for no reason!

7 answers

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It can be tough when family relationships are strained. Have you tried talking to your cousin about how you feel? Sometimes open communication can help improve things.

How do I do that?

Here are some steps you can take to communicate your feelings to your cousin:

  1. Choose the Right Time and Place: Find a quiet, comfortable setting where you can talk without distractions. Make sure both of you have time to discuss things.

  2. Be Calm and Respectful: Approach the conversation with a calm demeanor. Try to remain respectful, even if you’re feeling hurt or upset.

  3. Use "I" Statements: Express how you feel using "I" statements. For example, "I feel hurt when you make mean comments," instead of "You are mean to me." This helps express your feelings without sounding accusatory.

  4. Be Specific: Provide specific examples of behavior that you find hurtful. This will help your cousin understand exactly what actions are bothering you.

  5. Listen: Be open to hearing your cousin's perspective as well. There may be misunderstandings that can be clarified.

  6. Focus on Solutions: Discuss what can be done to improve your relationship. Suggest ways to communicate better or behave more positively towards each other.

  7. Be Prepared for Any Response: Your cousin may need time to process what you’ve said. They might respond positively or defensively. Be prepared for different reactions.

  8. Follow Up: After the conversation, give it some time, but check in with your cousin later to see if things have improved.

Remember, it’s important to focus on how you can express yourself genuinely, regardless of the outcome. Good luck!

I've done those things, but he's not nice....

I'm really sorry to hear that. It can be incredibly frustrating and hurtful when you've tried to communicate your feelings, but the other person isn’t receptive or continues to be unkind. Here are a few additional steps you might consider:

  1. Set Boundaries: If your cousin continues to be mean despite your efforts to communicate, it may be necessary to set some boundaries. Let them know what behavior is unacceptable to you and that you may need to distance yourself if it continues.

  2. Seek Support: Talk to someone you trust about the situation, whether it's another family member or a friend. They can provide perspective and support.

  3. Focus on Yourself: Sometimes, it’s helpful to redirect your energy. Engage in activities that make you happy or spend time with people who treat you with kindness and respect.

  4. Limit Interaction: If possible, consider limiting your interactions with your cousin to minimize stress. It’s okay to protect yourself from negative behavior.

  5. Reflect on the Relationship: It might be worth considering the overall relationship. Is this a pattern in how they treat you, or is it just a phase? Understanding the bigger picture can help you decide how to move forward.

  6. Consider Professional Help: If this situation is affecting your well-being, talking to a counselor or therapist can provide you with tools to cope and improve your situation.

Remember, you deserve to be treated well, and it's okay to prioritize your own mental health.

Done those lists, don't help!

I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It sounds like you've been very proactive in addressing the situation but haven't seen any positive changes. That can be incredibly disheartening. Here are some additional suggestions that might help:

  1. Acceptance: Sometimes, accepting that you can't change how someone behaves can alleviate some frustration. It doesn't excuse their behavior, but recognizing that their actions are out of your control might help you find peace.

  2. Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that boost your mood and well-being. Whether it's spending time with supportive friends, engaging in hobbies, or practicing mindfulness, self-care can help counterbalance the negativity.

  3. Focus on Positive Relationships: Surround yourself with people who treat you well. Building strong, positive relationships can help offset the negativity from your cousin and remind you of your worth.

  4. Redirect Conversations: When interacting with your cousin, try to steer conversations toward neutral or positive topics, or maintain a more superficial level of interaction to keep your distance from potential conflict.

  5. Consider Distance: If your cousin's behavior continues to impact you negatively despite your efforts, it may be worth considering taking a break from your interactions until things improve.

  6. Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be an effective way to process what you're experiencing. It can help you gain clarity and may even provide insights on how to deal with the situation.

  7. Seek Professional Guidance: If it's feasible, talking to a therapist or counselor could provide you with tailored strategies and emotional support to navigate this relationship.

It's completely valid to feel upset and frustrated in this situation. Sometimes, others' behaviors can be really difficult to understand or cope with. Remember, you're not alone in feeling this way, and it's okay to prioritize your own well-being.