Ms. Sue is this a good essay. please help me on words that will make the essay better, advice if any sentence is wrong. and anything that can make the essay sound more mature/professional than what it is, punctuation, capitalization, clarity, etc.
A good argument is convincing, effective, and reasonable, but a powerful argument has so much more. The newspaper argument is more effective than traditional school calendar argument for many reasons. Not only does it have more evidence and supporting details, but it also shows more structural component of an argument. In addition it employs a greater variety of methods, and has more logical and emotional appeals. Overall this proves that the newspaper argument is more effective than the traditional school calendar.
The newspaper argument shows structural components far better than the traditional school calendar argument. Not only does it give all the components but also a better understanding on what you are reading. The traditional school argument doesn't have all the components which are the counterargument, and the rebuttal. In the newspaper article it continuously explains how newspaper should be an elective, and gives good reasons why. For example, "it aims to help students develop tools for life," and "they see gains in both their oral and written communication." It also explains how some question whether or not its worth it for high schools to even publish newspapers since individual students can put their own content on blogs, websites, and facebook pages, and disagreeing by stating that all printed papers are now transitioned to e-newspaper format to meet their clientele where they are on the web. Therefore the traditional school calendar is not a powerful argument because it did not meet the requirements of a powerful argument.
In both arguments they show different type of methods, but again the newspaper argument gives more methods than the traditional school calendar argument. It continuously repeats how and why newspaper should be an elective which shows repetition and reasons why. It also shows prognostication by stating that they compete for jobs as editors, reporters, and designers. And lastly it shows address objections by giving a long argument on her opinion and reason why Ms. Logan should consider newspaper as a class elective. Furthermore the traditional school calendar also shows repetition and reasons why by also continuously stating that there is no need in year-round schedules since there are no positive effects towards it, but it does not show any further methods. This states that the newspaper argument once again gives a better argument by giving more methods then the other argument.
The newspaper argument mostly gives an emotional and logical appeal to the audience. It shows logos or logical appeal by giving details on how they create leaderships, improve their oral and written communication, acquire new meanings to website building, and overall get a better understanding and creating new skills for those who want to study journalism, photography, or web design. It shows pathos or emotional appeal by clearly suggesting that not only would it benefit the school but the students who participate would feel an integral part of the community throughout their positive contributions. Both of these appeals clearly show she is trying to convince the reader by giving reasons, but also convincing the students that they are appreciated by their work by being part of a community. Meanwhile the traditional school calendar also shows emotional and logical appeal. For example, it shows emotional by stating “ an important part of a child’s life is summertime. With year-round schedules, students would hardly have any time to relax.” and shows logical appeal by showing statistics, as proclaimed in the article “since 1980, 95% of schools that tried year-round schedule changed back to a traditional calendar. Although both articles clearly show the use of emotional and logical appeal, it is evident that the newspaper article clearly showed more use of both these appeals.
It is evident that the newspaper argument is more effective than the traditional school calendar argument by giving more structural components of an argument, better understanding of logical and emotional appeal and employing a greater variety of methods. Overall it gives a better visual and support on those motivated to take action for a future they would enjoy by starting small and making newspaper as an elective.
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