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make this sentence SLIGHTLY longer

April Applicant appears to have a ceaseless goal to join this school, April Applicant also accels in the photography aspect. Great 3.0 GPA and enthusiasm for the future as for your goals and signs of independence to start your own photography channel / business

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April Applicant demonstrates an unwavering determination and passion to become a part of this esteemed school. Additionally, they showcase impressive proficiency in photography. With a stellar 3.0 GPA and a clear sense of enthusiasm for their future endeavors, including the aspiration to establish their own photography channel or business, April Applicant exhibits promising signs of independence and ambition.
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