I saw your helped wanted ad for an office assistant for your small independent medical laboratory. I know that I will be a great asset to your company Please consider me for such position.
You should probably delete the words "small independent" - they're unnecessary. You should also change "will" to "would" in the second sentence, since you are not hired yet!
I graduated from Appleton High School in 1995. I was in the Honors program. After High School I went directly to Penn-State where I majored in Health care. I took several computer courses such as Microsoft Word And Excel.
It would read more smoothly if you find a way to combine the first and second sentences in this paragraph. Also, you don't need capitals in the third sentence for "high school" unless you're naming a particular school as you did in the first sentence. Also, no capital H is needed on "health" either.
After receiving my degree at Penn-State I took public speaking classes which provide me with strong communication skills. I am currently employed at Smith and Jones Health Care Clinic. My duties include scheduling appointments data entry maintain medical records along with filing paper work. Being that I work in a clinic I often need to speak with the physicians and other staff members. I believe working as a team is very important.
Commas needed for at least two different reasons; parallel construction is needed in the third sentence; get rid of "being that" and find a smoother way to phrase the beginning of that sentence.
I have been working at the clinic for the past 12 years and I have just learned that after being open for the past 30 years the clinic will be closing its doors in July. I am sure that because of my experience I will be able to work in a fast pace environment I am good a multi tasking.
run-on; word choice; uses of hyphen and commas
My current Boss Mr. Alan P. Smith has allowed me to use him for a reference.
capitalization rules? comma rules?
I look forward to hearing form you to set up an interview at your convenience. If you need to get in contact with me please feel free to call me at (518) 555-555
spelling; word choice; comma use; incomplete at the end of the last sentence.
Leah Certner
Human Resources Manager
Medi- Skill, Inc
122 West Third Street
Mayfield NY 12117
Dear Mrs. Certner:
I saw your helped wanted ad for an office assistant for your small independent medical laboratory. I know that I will be a great asset to your company Please consider me for such position.
I graduated from Appleton High School in 1995. I was in the Honors program. After High School I went directly to Penn-State where I majored in Health care. I took several computer courses such as Microsoft Word And Excel.
After receiving my degree at Penn-State I took public speaking classes which provide me with strong communication skills. I am currently employed at Smith and Jones Health Care Clinic. My duties include scheduling appointments data entry maintain medical records along with filing paper work. Being that I work in a clinic I often need to speak with the physicians and other staff members. I believe working as a team is very important.
I have been working at the clinic for the past 12 years and I have just learned that after being open for the past 30 years the clinic will be closing its doors in July. I am sure that because of my experience I will be able to work in a fast pace environment I am good a multi tasking.
My current Boss Mr. Alan P. Smith has allowed me to use him for a reference.
I look forward to hearing form you to set up an interview at your convenience. If you need to get in contact with me please feel free to call me at (518) 555-555
Sincerely,
Kaleigh A. Peters
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