In the essay by Derek Bok "Protecting Freedom of Expression on Campus" does this thesis sound like it would work with the essay? Inappropriateness causes dissonance with each other.

Answer 1

Clearly, you haven't heeded any of Ms. Sue's prior attempts to help you wade through this.

Your thesis statement must include factual information plus your position/opinion/stance. Without your position on the topic, it isn't a true thesis statement. So think of this sentence as the angle you want to take on the topic and what you intend to prove by the end of your paper. (If your statement is simply factual, then there's nothing to prove!)

http://blog.eduify.com/index.php/2009/06/21/5-tips-on-how-to-write-a-strong-thesis-statement/
Read carefully and follow ALL directions.

http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/thesistatement.html
This is one of the very best places I've seen online to help students write good thesis statements. It shows you sentences that aren't thesis statements and how to turn each one into real thesis statements.