I need help on proof reading this story.
Christmas should be a time of celebrating the birth of Christ, but it seems like people make it more about themselves and what should they get for each other and who’s gift is more expensive or how we can compete when it comes to decorating our homes, gifts, food, how much money we spend and how we look.
When you watch Television you should see more stories about the Christ his life and more religious topics but you see advertisements about different department stores, how big your Television should be, what is the next trend or how big and fancy you can make your dining table to basically show off in front of your friends.
The general meaning of Christmas is to teach your kids about Christ, teach them how to be kind to people and that Christmas is more about giving not taking. Let your kids know you can always make a gift for some one because it comes from your heart and it means something and it is more special.
In conclusion Televisions and Advertisement Companies should stop ruining the meaning of Christmas by advertising about how much you should spend to show how much you love someone and educate people more about giving and being kind to each other.
2 answers
Get rid of any first and second person pronouns.
Misuse of "like" in at least one place. (Use "like" when followed by a word or phrase; use "as if" when followed by a clause.)
Undeveloped paragraphs. Read carefully:
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/paragraphs.htm