I am fourteen and my skin has betrayed me the boy I cannot live without still sucks his thumb in secret how come my knees are always so ashy what if I die before morning and momma's in the bedroom with the door closed. 10 I have to learn how to dance in time for the next party my room is too small for me suppose I die before graduation they will sing sad melodies but finally tell the truth about me There is nothing I want to do and too much that has to be done and momma's in the bedroom with the door closed. 15 20 Nobody even stops to think about my side of it I should have been on Math Team my marks were better than his why do I have to be the one wearing braces I have nothing to wear tomorrow will I live long enough to grow up and momma's in the bedroom with the door closed.

Question

discuss the theme in this poem

Answer 1

The poem you provided explores complex themes of adolescence, identity, isolation, and the juxtaposition of inner turmoil with the external world. Here are some key themes present in the poem:

1. Adolescence and Identity Struggles: The speaker grapples with the challenges of growing up, including physical changes (e.g., "ashy knees") and social pressures (e.g., wanting to learn how to dance for a party). The references to braces and feelings of inadequacy signify common teenage experiences of self-consciousness and the struggle to fit in.

2. Isolation and Loneliness: The recurring line, "momma's in the bedroom with the door closed," emphasizes a sense of emotional isolation. The speaker feels unheard and unseen by those who are supposed to provide support. This physical separation mirrors the emotional distance, suggesting that the speaker’s struggles are compounded by a lack of understanding and connection with their family.

3. Fear and Mortality: Phrases like "what if I die before morning" and "suppose I die before graduation" reveal a stark awareness of mortality and the fragility of life. The contemplation of death may express the speaker's feelings of helplessness and anxiety, common among adolescents who often feel overwhelmed by their circumstances.

4. Desire for Recognition: The speaker expresses a longing to be seen and recognized for their potential (e.g., stating they should have been on Math Team) and their uniqueness. The frustration over being compared to others, particularly the mention of a peer with “better” circumstances, highlights the desire for validation and acknowledgment from peers and family.

5. Burden of Expectations: The phrase "too much that has to be done" captures the pressure adolescents feel to meet societal expectations while simultaneously wrestling with their own desires and interests. This theme reflects the often conflicting demands of growing up, such as academics, social events, and personal aspirations.

Overall, the poem poignantly captures the tumultuous emotions of adolescence, characterized by a quest for identity, a yearning for connection, and the weight of societal and familial expectations. It evokes empathy for the speaker’s plight, as they navigate this challenging stage of life.