Hi I am looking or Ms Sue. I have finished the Thesis Statement, Introduction, and the Conclusion...would you mind to read it and see if it all works together for the Persuasive or Arguementative Paper..thanks so much for your time.

6 answers

I'll be glad to read it within the next half hour.
Thesis
Cyber-bullying may cause its victim more emotional distress than the traditional schoolyard bully did.

Introduction
Let us go back to 1980, back to the good ole’ days when being a bully meant being physically, mentally and emotionally cruel to his or her victim. Most every child has grown up on one side of the fence being either the bully or the victim. Those days were a rough time in a kid’s life. Most times the best part of their day was getting home. ‘Whew, made it home now were safe’ is sure to have been the thought at the time. Let us now travel 20 years into the future to today when technology gives today’s kids more ways to connect, socialize, and communicate, this is the good news. The bad news however is that kids are abusing the technology. This generation is no longer just a schoolyard bully it has evolved into a new high tech version of the schoolyard bully. Cyber-bullying is cruel anti-social behavior acted out either online or through cell phones. Because of this new technology, Cyber-bullying may cause its victims more emotional distress than the
traditional schoolyard bully did.

Conclusion
In conclusion, cyber bullying is a growing problem among teens that rely on modern methods of communication. Cyber-bullying can take on many forms and can be very damaging to teens. Because of the ability of the cyber-bullies to have unlimited access to his or her victim compared to the traditional schoolyard bully, the emotional distress from the cyber-bullying could prove to be much worse.
Does the body of your paper show how cyberbullying produces this emotional distress? Does the body of your paper detail why cyberbullying may be worse than conventional bullying?
It will...It is not complete yet..The instructor had us to write the introduction and the conclusion today. We don't even start the rough draft of the paper till next week..Basically the conclusion was from the last part of the sentence outline.
Oh, my! In my opinion, your instructor has it all backwards. The thesis statement and the body of the paper should be written first. How can you introduce something that doesn't exist? How can you conclude something that doesn't exist?

When you write your paper, I hope you address these facts:

People can change email addresses and instant message names.
People can "defriend" those they don't like.
People don't have to look at sites in which they're bullied.
Thank u so much for your help and I will keep that in mind for sure when I finish my rough draft paper for next!