Help. ME!!! 😭😭

For these past 2 years, I have been crushing on two very cute (in my opinion) guys, and I can't get over them. The problem isn't that fact that it's two people it's the fact the the people I'm crushing on is DEAD. Yes, you heard me, D.E.A.D. And yet, I love them so much and miss them so much, that I can't get over them! An say that they was still alive, one would be 25 this year, and the other one would be 26. And I'm only 14! (I'm a girl, btw) I think I need mental help...

5 answers

It's completely understandable to have strong feelings for people who have passed away, especially if they were influential figures in your life, like celebrities, musicians, or historical figures. It's important to remember that having crushes or feelings for people from the past doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It speaks to your capacity to connect with others emotionally, even if they are not physically present.

That said, it might be helpful to explore why you feel so attached to these individuals. Sometimes, we may idealize people we've never met or project our own desires and feelings onto them. It can be a way of processing our own emotions or unmet needs.

Here are a few things you might consider doing:

  1. Talk About It: Sharing your thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend or family member can help. They might provide you with different perspectives and support.

  2. Creative Expression: Write about your feelings, create art, or express yourself in other forms. This can be a healthy way to process your emotions.

  3. Explore New Interests: Try to engage with new hobbies or activities that interest you. This might help redirect your focus and create new connections.

  4. Consider Speaking with a Professional: If these feelings persist and seem overwhelming, talking to a school counselor or a mental health professional can help you navigate your emotions.

  5. Connect with Others: Finding communities—whether online or in person—where people share your interests can help you form relationships with those who are alive and accessible to you.

Remember, you're still very young, and it's normal to have crushes, whether they're on real people or fictional characters. Give yourself time to explore your feelings, and know that it's okay to seek help when you need it. You're not alone in feeling this way!

Err... um, well, one of them died from sickness, and the other one got shot and killed. Both very well known. Both died within the years 2018-2019. I was only 8~9 years old back then, but I absolutely loved both of them. I still imagene in my head what would happen if I was with ethier one of them.

It sounds like you have some very intense feelings connected to these two individuals, which is completely valid, especially considering the circumstances of their deaths and how impactful they may have been in your life. When celebrities or figures we admire pass away, it can evoke deep feelings of loss and longing, particularly if they have been a source of inspiration or joy for you.

Imagining what life would be like with them is a natural way to process those feelings, especially at your age, when emotions can feel very strong and sometimes confusing. It creates a sense of connection, allowing you to explore your feelings and daydream about relationships that may never be possible.

Here are a few things to consider as you process these feelings:

  1. Understand Your Emotions: It's okay to feel sadness or longing for someone who has died, even if you never met them. Your feelings are important, and acknowledging them can be a step toward understanding yourself better.

  2. Create a Tribute: Consider expressing your feelings through a tribute—writing a letter, creating art, or even compiling memories and songs that remind you of them. This can be a way to honor their memory while also allowing you to express your own feelings.

  3. Find Real-Life Inspiration: Try to channel your admiration for these individuals into aspects of your life that you can control. This could involve pursuing interests or causes they cared about or seeking out real-life role models who can provide that connection in a more tangible way.

  4. Talk to Someone: If you still feel overwhelmed by these emotions or if they're interfering with your daily life, consider talking to a trusted adult, school counselor, or therapist. They can provide support and help you process those feelings in a healthy way.

  5. Connect with Others who Share Your Interests: There are many fan communities online or in person that focus on celebrating the lives and legacies of those who have passed away. Joining one can help you feel connected to others who share your feelings and respect for these individuals.

Every emotion you feel is part of your journey, and it's important to give yourself space to explore them. You're not alone in how you feel, and seeking support when you need it can help you navigate these complex emotions.

Okay, even more complex: One was a Actor, the other was a Rapper. (Huge hint there, if you want to know who it is. I'm not gonna say it, though! 😜)

It's completely normal to have strong feelings for public figures, especially when they leave a significant impact through their art, whether that be acting or music. Both actors and musicians can resonate with fans on very personal levels, whether through their performances, lyrics, or the personas they project.

The fact that one was an actor and the other a rapper explains why you might feel a strong connection to their personalities and the emotions they conveyed through their work. It’s common to feel a sense of loss for public figures we admire, especially when their lives come to such tragic ends.

Since you’re reluctant to share their names, that’s perfectly okay! What’s important is recognizing and understanding your emotions. Here are a few things you can keep in mind:

  1. Community and Shared Interests: Engaging with fan communities dedicated to these individuals can offer a sense of connection with others who share your admiration. You can share memories, art, and discussions related to their work, which can be healing.

  2. Explore Their Work: Revisit films, music, or interviews that impacted you. Sometimes, reflecting on their work can help you feel connected while also celebrating their contributions to the world.

  3. Personal Reflection: Consider what aspects of their lives or works resonate with you most. Is it their talent, their stories, or the way they made you feel? Reflecting on these things can help you understand what you admire and how it relates to your own life and aspirations.

  4. Dreams and Motivations: While imagining your life with them can be comforting, also think about how their legacies can inspire you. What qualities did they have that you admire? You might find motivation to embody some of those traits in your own life.

  5. Writing or Journaling: If you feel comfortable, writing down your feelings or even creating fictional scenarios can help you process and understand your emotions better.

If you ever feel overwhelmed by these feelings or find it hard to cope, seeking support from someone you trust can be invaluable. Remember, feelings surrounding loss, admiration, and longing are complex and completely okay to explore. You're doing great by seeking to understand your emotions!