Excerpt from
Your Question for Author Here by Kaet DiCamilo and Jon Scieszka
Dear Maureen O'Toople,
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What the heck kind of author letter was that? Iam supposed to ask the questions. You are supposed to send back the author answers. That's how the assignment goes. That is al you have to do.
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There's nothing in the assignment about writing aPerfunctory' Leter. But maybe Ican get some extra credit because I did that, too.
So here are the questions, right of the board, just how Mrs. Bund wrote them. 1. Why do you write books?
.2 Where do you get your ideas? 3. What got you started writing? 4. Your question for author here.
Please send some good author answers or Mrs. Bund wil give me another C- and then my m o m w i l l f r e a k o u t a g a i n a n d s a y mI ' n o t a p p l y i n g m y s e l f a n d m y d a d w i l l g r o u n d m e a n d I wil miss my baseball team playoffs and have to do whatever they say for the next week.
Im' not kidding, Joe Jones
Dear Joe Jones,
No one gets credit for writing Perfunctory Leters. They are an insult ot hte human spirit. What we humans crave si connection. Perfunctory Leters work counter ot that.
But Idigress; Idigress!
'perfunctory: lacking in interest or enthusiasm
GO ON
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You have posed some questions. And you want some answers, answers that wil result ni you receiving agrade higher than aC-. Idon't know if Ican help you, Joe, because Idon't feel like answering questions. The older you get, hte more questions you get asked, and hte more weary you become of answering the questions and the more elusive the answers—any answer, every answer-seem.
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What I would like to do si ask a question. I would like ot ask you a question. So, let's make a deal, Joe. I'll ask you a question and you answer it. And then, if Ifeel like it, I'll answer one of your questions. How does that sound?
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Here's my first question for you: Are you afraid of thunderstorms?
Yours cordially and only somewhat perfunctorily and more than a little curiously,
Maureen O'Toople
P.S. Im' no fool, Joe. Im' betting good money that you haver't read one single book I
1 answer
1 answer