I don't know what your assignment said, so I hope the use of first person ("I") is OK. Read and compare yours and mine very carefully so you catch everything -- punctuation, etc.
I particularly liked Erasmus's view that people should not care if other humans hiss at them as long as they<~~Who are "they" and "themselves"?~~> applaud themselves. I love the idea that it is a good to praise yourself when no one else will do it for you. After reading the story, I realize that today’s world is completely different from Erasmus's world. Today, we care about people when we make decisions about ourselves, even if it is regarding to our appearance, style, and speech. A few days ago, an article caught my attention in our newspaper that 80 percent of people make decisions because they are afraid of other people's judgments. They don’t make decisions based on what they are and what they like most. In contrast, folly is above to all<~~What? because she<~~Who is "she"? ~~> thinks all great actions depend upon her. She is the best at everything. For instance she thinks what a big deal if her speech is unprepared but she is genuine by birth. “I was certain that none of you is so wise” (1925). She emphasizes that important secret ingredient for the happiness life is “the spice of folly” (1925). <~~You REALLY need to clarify this last part. You threw this "she" in there with no connection, no identification, etc.
Dear teachers ...
please read this paragraph .i know it if full of error but plz help me.
I particularly liked Erasmus view that people should not care if other humans hiss at them as long as they applaud themselves. I love the idea that it is a good to praise yourself when no one else will do it for you. After reading the story, I realized that today’s world is completely different from Erasmus‘s world. Today, we care about people when we make decisions about ourselves, even if it is regarding to our appearance, Style, and speech. A few days ago, an article caught my attention in newspaper that 80 percent people make their decisions because they are afraid of others people‘s judgments. They don’t choice what they are at best and what they like most. In contract folly is above to all because she thinks all great actions depend upon her. She is the best at everything. For instance she thinks what a big deal if her speech is unprepared but she is genuine by birth. “I was certain that none of you is so wise” (1925). She empahis that importance secret ingredient of the happiness life is “the spice of folly” (1925)
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1 answer