Hmmmm. Did you do this? << The paragraph must describe one particular experience you�ve had that inspired you or guided you to choose the type of position for which you applied.>>
I think not.
Secondly, buy not describing one particular experience, your draft falls into vague generalities, and a lot of hornblowing. The assignment did not ask for that, and in the real world, it makes the reader highly suspicious, if not ready to puke. Mdntioning Penn-Foster is probably not helping you either, since that school does not have a very good reputation for preparing anyone. I wouldn't mention it, but frankly, in this assignment it is not relevant, as the assignment is clear: d,,,,must describe one particular experience ....
Background
You’ve applied for a specific job in your field of study. The Human Resources Department arranges an
interview and tells you to bring with you a polished piece of writing for them to evaluate your writing skills. The paragraph must describe one particular experience you’ve had that inspired you or guided you to choose the type of position for which you applied.
Your audience is your potential employer and your purpose is to show you have thought carefully about what and/or who has motivated you toward this career choice and why. In addition, you want to convey your enthusiasm for this position as it relates to your inspiring experience. Take time to think about what your audience wants to know and strive to reach a balance between informal and
formal business writing.
Process
1. Prewrite about your field of study and create a specific job for which you might want to apply
at a particular business or organization in your area. Outline what that position would look like.
Brainstorm details, names, titles, and facts to provide depth to your paragraph and enable you
to write a polished paragraph.
This is my first draft. Is this correctly written for my assignment?
I am extremely excited about beginning my career of computer support technician with you at Microdyne Computers. I look forward with great anticipation to the challenges of today’s ever changing computer industry. The computer industry has always been an interesting career to learn. It has always been a dream of mine to pursue, however my passion for computer support technician arose due to my personal experience with my friends and families computers. This inspired me to further my education into the computer support technician. I have maintained all computer systems, desktops and peripherals, such as, troubleshooting and repair, hardware, operating systems, software & Internet problems, upgrades. Computer problems sometimes can be stressful, but it’s never boring. I enjoy the challenge. With frequent training and keeping up with the latest technology and threats, I am able to identify problems quickly. My training has involved taking courses in PC Maintenance Repair and Computer Support Technician through Penn-Foster. I am also studying for my certificate CompTia A+. I am hard worker, honest, trustworthy, patient and reliable person. I have skill and am eager to learn and enjoy taking on new challenges. I am confident that I could make a valuable contribution to your company with my qualifications.
4 answers
Thanks,really appreciate you info on this...screwed up. How's this?
I am extremely excited about beginning my career as a computer support technician with you at Microdyne Computers. I look forward with great anticipation to the challenges of today’s ever changing computer industry. The computer industry has always been an interesting career to learn. It has always been a dream of mine to pursue, however my passion for computer support technician arose due to my personal experience with my friends and families computers. One day a friend called in a panic, she needed some important files from her computer for work and computer would not turn on. She also mentioned that a lightning storm had been in her area the previous night. She said she could smell something burning around her computer. At the time, I lived too far away to assist her so I advised her to take it to a repair shop, and have it looked at. A power surge had gone through and fried the motherboard. They were able to set her up with new computer and retrieve her data from her old hard drive. This inspired me to further my education as a computer support technician. I have repaired and maintained all computer systems, desktops and peripherals, such as, troubleshooting and repair, hardware, operating systems, software & Internet problems and upgrades. Computer problems sometimes can be stressful, but it’s never boring. I enjoy the challenge. With frequent training and keeping up with the latest technology and threats, I am able to identify problems quickly. My training has involved taking courses in PC Maintenance Repair and Computer Support Technician. I am also studying for my certificate CompTia A+. I am hard worker, honest, trustworthy, patient and reliable person. I have skill and am eager to learn and enjoy taking on new challenges. I am confident that I could make a valuable contribution to your company with my qualifications.
I am extremely excited about beginning my career as a computer support technician with you at Microdyne Computers. I look forward with great anticipation to the challenges of today’s ever changing computer industry. The computer industry has always been an interesting career to learn. It has always been a dream of mine to pursue, however my passion for computer support technician arose due to my personal experience with my friends and families computers. One day a friend called in a panic, she needed some important files from her computer for work and computer would not turn on. She also mentioned that a lightning storm had been in her area the previous night. She said she could smell something burning around her computer. At the time, I lived too far away to assist her so I advised her to take it to a repair shop, and have it looked at. A power surge had gone through and fried the motherboard. They were able to set her up with new computer and retrieve her data from her old hard drive. This inspired me to further my education as a computer support technician. I have repaired and maintained all computer systems, desktops and peripherals, such as, troubleshooting and repair, hardware, operating systems, software & Internet problems and upgrades. Computer problems sometimes can be stressful, but it’s never boring. I enjoy the challenge. With frequent training and keeping up with the latest technology and threats, I am able to identify problems quickly. My training has involved taking courses in PC Maintenance Repair and Computer Support Technician. I am also studying for my certificate CompTia A+. I am hard worker, honest, trustworthy, patient and reliable person. I have skill and am eager to learn and enjoy taking on new challenges. I am confident that I could make a valuable contribution to your company with my qualifications.
Good.
Thanks for all your help..