To make your children capable of honesty is the beginning of education. (BETTER IF REVERSED. "THE BEGINNING OF EDUCATION IS MAKING YOUR CHILDREN....") I think John Ruskin had it right when he said that. ("SAID"? WAS THIS A QUOTE? IF NOT A QUOTE, IT MIGHT BE BETTER TO USE TERM LIKE "EMPHASIZED".) I think Mr. Hundert would agree, but obviously Sedgewick Bell, (NO COMMA) and his father did not. Bell, a rebellious student, (NO COMMA)in the Emperor’s Club, would have viewers think that cheating is ok. ("OKAY" OR "ACCEPTABLE") Bell is smart and capable, but it is easier to cheat than to study, so he does. Bell cheats publicly and he is not “outed,” proving that sometimes there are no ("IMMEDIATE"? EVENTUALLY THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES.) consequences.
This is not about Bell making a mistake, (SEIMCOLON) he has made his life about lying (AWKWARD PHRASING). Later, he has the opportunity to redeem himself, yet he cheats again. When he is privately confronted by Hundert, he (WHICH "HE"? USE "BELL.") ridicules him as though his values are silly. Bell has no concern about the fall out ("EFFECT"?) of his dishonest behaviors. Obviously his cheating affects others (COMMA) when he takes the rightful spot of another in a contest. And, then worse, even when he becomes a father, his son (NAME?) witnesses his behavior. Bell and his fathers (POSSESSIVE) actions show that success is more important to them than integrity. (IF TALKING ABOUT FATHER AND SON, NEED TO MAKE DISTINCTION CLEAR AS TO WHICH BELL YOU ARE DISCUSSING.)
Since I am not aware of the story, I only proofread your article rather than assessing your logic. However, I hope this helps. Thanks for asking.
Assignment: 2 paragraphs on Integrity based on the Emperor's Club
3 facts with 2 supporting details of each fact an opening and a closing...Does this satisfy the requirements? And, please do a quick proofreading. Thank you.
To make your children capable of honesty is the beginning of education. I think John Ruskin had it right when he said that. I think Mr. Hundert would agree, but obviously Sedgewick Bell, and his father did not. Bell, a rebellious student, in the Emperor’s Club, would have viewers think that cheating is ok. Bell is smart and capable, but it is easier to cheat than to study, so he does. Bell cheats publicly and he is not “outed,” proving that sometimes there are no consequences.
This is not about Bell making a mistake, he has made his life about lying. Later, he has the opportunity to redeem himself, yet he cheats again. When he is privately confronted by Hundert, he ridicules him as though his values are silly. Bell has no concern about the fall out of his dishonest behaviors. Obviously his cheating affects others when he takes the rightful spot of another in a contest. And, then worse, even when he becomes a father, his son witnesses his behavior. Bell and his fathers actions show that success is more important to them than integrity.
1 answer