Question

plz can anyone check my poem and mark my correct my mistakes.

Lasts Forever
once aparted, never met again
never saw the wound heeling again

once desired, beyond dreams
no one i saw blessed anymore

once hurtled, smashed from the roots
never saw a tree crashed like a walnut

once dead, somehow turned the soul red
haven't seen venom spread like blood in body

Answer 1

There's no such word as "aparted" (for one thing).

I think you mean "crushed" instead of "crashed"

Answer 2

yeah crushed sorry my mistake. then what should i use instead of aparted?

Answer 3

Just use "apart" -- and I think you mean "healing" (not "heeling"), right?

Answer 4

yeah healing and dose this poem make sense and is it good or not or any grammatical mistakes ?

Answer 5

I have no idea what you're trying to describe -- a person? a town? a neighborhood? a lifestyle? or ???

Answer 6

a failure lover.

Answer 7

Somehow you need to make that clear!

Answer 8

where should i make the changes ?

Answer 9

i changed the sentence number 6
"never saw a heart crushed like a walnut"