Asked by Claire

I'm writing an essay and was wondering if this part was okay.

I was eager for this day to end and summer begin. Despite my eagerness, I was excited about the “surprise” guest the school had booked to make this day special for our graduating class.

Should I just say simplify it and say "I was excited.."
Answered by Ms. Sue
Yes.

"Despite my eagerness" doesn't belong with "I was excited."

You could insert "though" after "excited."
Answered by Claire
Ok, thanks so much Ms. Sue!
Answered by Claire
I'm sorry to bother again but would this work?

Despite my eagerness for the day to end, I was excited about the “surprise” guest the school had booked to make this day special for our graduating class.
Answered by Ms. Sue
Yes. That's very good!

Answered by Claire
Ah Yay! Thank you (:
Answered by Ms. Sue
You're welcome. :-)
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