Asked by ryan
Scripture for how to you talk with a christian who believes being gay/trans isnt a sin?
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Do you mean (A) Bible passages that guide how to talk with a fellow Christian about a disagreement, or (B) passages people commonly use about same‑sex practice / gender to argue theologically that being gay or trans is sinful? I can give both. Before I do: I’ll assume you want to engage respectfully and constructively — I’ll include guidance on tone and approach, because that matters as much as which verses you quote.
1) Scriptures about how to talk with a fellow believer (focus on humility, love, listening)
- Matthew 18:15–17 — a procedure for addressing a sin or disagreement privately first, then with witnesses. Emphasizes restoration, not public shaming.
- Ephesians 4:15 — “speaking the truth in love.” Encourages combining truthfulness with love and maturity.
- Colossians 4:6 — “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt,” i.e., be winsome and wise in conversation.
- 1 Peter 3:15–16 — be ready to give a reasoned answer for your hope, but do so with gentleness and respect.
- Proverbs 15:1 — “A soft answer turns away wrath.” Avoid escalating with harsh words.
- Romans 12:18 / Matthew 7:1–5 — seek peace; examine your own heart before judging others.
Use these when you want to frame the conversation as mutual study rather than a debate to “win.”
2) Passages commonly discussed about sexual behavior and gender (what people cite and why)
If you intend to discuss theological views about same‑sex sexual behavior or gender expression, these are the key texts people bring up. Note: each has significant hermeneutical and contextual questions, and Christians differ about how to interpret them.
Passages often cited about same‑sex sexual acts:
- Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13 — prohibitions in the Holiness Code.
- Romans 1:26–27 — Paul’s discussion of same‑sex relations in a passage about idolatry and suppressed truth.
- 1 Corinthians 6:9–11 — a list including terms often translated as referring to same‑sex behavior.
- 1 Timothy 1:9–10 — a list of wrongdoers that some translators connect to homosexual conduct.
Passages related to gender / cross‑dressing / created sexes:
- Deuteronomy 22:5 — prohibition against men wearing women’s clothing and vice versa (commonly discussed in relation to gender expression).
- Genesis 1:27 and Matthew 19:4–6 — statements about male and female created by God, often used in arguments about gender/sexual ethics.
- Galatians 3:28 — “There is neither male nor female…” — used to emphasize spiritual equality and sometimes as a corrective to rigid gender categories.
Important context and cautions
- Many scholars emphasize historical, cultural, and linguistic context (e.g., what kinds of same‑sex activity were in view, the meaning of particular Greek terms, the Old Testament covenant context).
- There is serious disagreement among sincere Christians about how these verses apply today to committed same‑sex relationships or transgender identity. Be ready for different interpretive frameworks.
- Quoting these verses without listening or compassion often shuts down conversation. Scripture invites both truth and grace.
3) Practical tips for the conversation
- Start by asking questions: “Can you tell me how you came to that view?” “Which passages helped shape you?” Listening builds trust and lets you understand their reasoning.
- Ask permission before reading or quoting someone’s proof text: “Would you mind if I share several passages that shape how I understand this?”
- Use the relational and pastoral scriptures above to set the tone: “I want to talk about this because I care for you and value Scripture. Let’s be honest with each other and gentle.”
- Focus on shared commitments (authority of Scripture, the character of God) and on pastoral concerns (how to love people who are different).
- Distinguish between doctrine and pastoral care. Even if you disagree doctrinally, show care for a person’s flourishing.
- Be humble about interpretive limits. Offer to study a passage together, consult commentaries, or pray about it.
4) Sample phrases you can use
- “I value our shared desire to follow Scripture. Can we look at Romans 1 together and compare how we understand it?”
- “I may be misunderstanding — can you tell me which texts led you to that conclusion?”
- “Ephesians 4 says we should speak the truth in love; I want to be faithful to Scripture and also loving. Can I share what I think, and could you tell me how you see it?”
5) If you want more
- I can give brief summaries of the main interpretive approaches to Romans 1, the Levitical laws, the Pauline lists, and Deuteronomy 22:5, with key scholarly questions and suggested resources from different perspectives (conservative and affirming).
- Or I can draft a short, scripture‑based conversation script tailored to whether you want to persuade, understand, or maintain fellowship.
Which would you prefer: focused “how to talk” verses and a script, or a rundown of the specific Bible passages and major interpretive positions on them?
1) Scriptures about how to talk with a fellow believer (focus on humility, love, listening)
- Matthew 18:15–17 — a procedure for addressing a sin or disagreement privately first, then with witnesses. Emphasizes restoration, not public shaming.
- Ephesians 4:15 — “speaking the truth in love.” Encourages combining truthfulness with love and maturity.
- Colossians 4:6 — “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt,” i.e., be winsome and wise in conversation.
- 1 Peter 3:15–16 — be ready to give a reasoned answer for your hope, but do so with gentleness and respect.
- Proverbs 15:1 — “A soft answer turns away wrath.” Avoid escalating with harsh words.
- Romans 12:18 / Matthew 7:1–5 — seek peace; examine your own heart before judging others.
Use these when you want to frame the conversation as mutual study rather than a debate to “win.”
2) Passages commonly discussed about sexual behavior and gender (what people cite and why)
If you intend to discuss theological views about same‑sex sexual behavior or gender expression, these are the key texts people bring up. Note: each has significant hermeneutical and contextual questions, and Christians differ about how to interpret them.
Passages often cited about same‑sex sexual acts:
- Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13 — prohibitions in the Holiness Code.
- Romans 1:26–27 — Paul’s discussion of same‑sex relations in a passage about idolatry and suppressed truth.
- 1 Corinthians 6:9–11 — a list including terms often translated as referring to same‑sex behavior.
- 1 Timothy 1:9–10 — a list of wrongdoers that some translators connect to homosexual conduct.
Passages related to gender / cross‑dressing / created sexes:
- Deuteronomy 22:5 — prohibition against men wearing women’s clothing and vice versa (commonly discussed in relation to gender expression).
- Genesis 1:27 and Matthew 19:4–6 — statements about male and female created by God, often used in arguments about gender/sexual ethics.
- Galatians 3:28 — “There is neither male nor female…” — used to emphasize spiritual equality and sometimes as a corrective to rigid gender categories.
Important context and cautions
- Many scholars emphasize historical, cultural, and linguistic context (e.g., what kinds of same‑sex activity were in view, the meaning of particular Greek terms, the Old Testament covenant context).
- There is serious disagreement among sincere Christians about how these verses apply today to committed same‑sex relationships or transgender identity. Be ready for different interpretive frameworks.
- Quoting these verses without listening or compassion often shuts down conversation. Scripture invites both truth and grace.
3) Practical tips for the conversation
- Start by asking questions: “Can you tell me how you came to that view?” “Which passages helped shape you?” Listening builds trust and lets you understand their reasoning.
- Ask permission before reading or quoting someone’s proof text: “Would you mind if I share several passages that shape how I understand this?”
- Use the relational and pastoral scriptures above to set the tone: “I want to talk about this because I care for you and value Scripture. Let’s be honest with each other and gentle.”
- Focus on shared commitments (authority of Scripture, the character of God) and on pastoral concerns (how to love people who are different).
- Distinguish between doctrine and pastoral care. Even if you disagree doctrinally, show care for a person’s flourishing.
- Be humble about interpretive limits. Offer to study a passage together, consult commentaries, or pray about it.
4) Sample phrases you can use
- “I value our shared desire to follow Scripture. Can we look at Romans 1 together and compare how we understand it?”
- “I may be misunderstanding — can you tell me which texts led you to that conclusion?”
- “Ephesians 4 says we should speak the truth in love; I want to be faithful to Scripture and also loving. Can I share what I think, and could you tell me how you see it?”
5) If you want more
- I can give brief summaries of the main interpretive approaches to Romans 1, the Levitical laws, the Pauline lists, and Deuteronomy 22:5, with key scholarly questions and suggested resources from different perspectives (conservative and affirming).
- Or I can draft a short, scripture‑based conversation script tailored to whether you want to persuade, understand, or maintain fellowship.
Which would you prefer: focused “how to talk” verses and a script, or a rundown of the specific Bible passages and major interpretive positions on them?
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