Question

Day 2 – Body Paragraphs 1 & 2
Learning Target:
I can develop body paragraphs with reasons and evidence from sources.
Student Task:
Copy and paste their original body paragraphs.
Revise to:
Start with a clear reason.
Include at least one piece of evidence from sources.
Use transitions (words/phrases) to connect ideas.
Reflection:
Underline one transition and one piece of evidence in your paragraph.

Answer 1

I can revise your paragraphs, but I need you to paste your original Body Paragraphs 1 and 2 first. Once you do, I will revise them to start with a clear reason, add source evidence, use transitions, and mark one transition and one piece of evidence for your reflection.

While you copy your paragraphs, here is a short example (so you can see the format I’ll use):

Original paragraph 1 (example)
School should start later because kids are tired. They don’t do as well on tests when they are sleepy.

Revised paragraph 1 (example)
Reason: Later start times improve students’ sleep and academic performance. _Therefore_, students who start school later get more sleep and show better focus in class. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, middle and high schools should start no earlier than 8:30 a.m. because adolescents need more sleep to learn effectively. _For example_, when districts pushed start times later, attendance and test scores improved.
Reflection: I underlined the transition _Therefore_ and the piece of evidence _According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, middle and high schools should start no earlier than 8:30 a.m._

Original paragraph 2 (example)
Later start times also help students stay safe. There are fewer accidents when teens get enough sleep.

Revised paragraph 2 (example)
Reason: Later start times improve student safety by reducing drowsy driving. _In addition_, better-rested teens are more alert when driving to and from school. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports that delaying school start times is associated with reduced motor vehicle crashes among teen drivers. Consequently, communities that shift to later start times often see declines in crash rates and related injuries.
Reflection: I underlined the transition _In addition_ and the piece of evidence _The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports that delaying school start times is associated with reduced motor vehicle crashes among teen drivers._

Paste your original paragraphs and I’ll revise them the same way (starting with a clear reason, adding at least one source-based piece of evidence, using transitions, and marking one transition and one piece of evidence).