Business Communication and Report Writing

GRADED ACTIVITY:
PROOFREADING

Assignment #3: Proofreading
Your organization also provides customer service training workshops to companies and other organizations. Your supervisor wants you to review a written proposal regarding potential business with the Employment Vocational Training Company. This document has been designed to have fairly obvious errors, we are not trying to trick you. Correct all of the errors you find using Track Changes, or highlight the errors. Once you have found all of the errors submit your document for grading. Submissions that do not have highlighting or Track Changes will not be marked and will require a resubmission.

March 1st/19

Jessica Quach, President
Employment Vocational Training
238 Nelson Road
ScarboroughOntario, H4K 1M9

to whom it may concern,

thank you for considering We Help - Tutoring Services for your training needs. based on our conversation last Friday I am pleased to propose the preliminary outline of the customer service workshop I have also included a brochure with these details.

Workshop Overview
The 2-day Customer Service Strategist workshop encourages participants to define and refine for superior customer service, During the workshop, participants will

• Begin with ice-breaker, self-assessment, and goal-setting exercises
• Role-play of active listening, questioning, and problem-solving strategies
• analyze and identify excellent customer service attitudes and behaviours
• Identify and apply to or tree conflict negotiating models
• Articulate best-practices behaviours as the organizational standard
• Set a goal for further development

Depending on participants’ preference, we can begin at 8:00 AM or 8:30 AM and finish at 4:00 PM or 4:30 PM. I’ve attached a proposed agenda for your approval.

Methods
Using a variety of interactive exercises, including case analysis, taped role-play, pear feedback, and self-assessment, your employees will review, describe, and apply behaviours that building customer relationships.

Since customized content contributes two learning transfer, I would like to visit your locations for a few hours to observe your service representatives before the training dates. This complimentary needs assessment will allowed me to gather information about current practices, and to see your training facilities.

Resources
As we discussed, you employees will need interrupted time to review and practice customer service techniques. Because participants will be working together and moving around, they will need group seating, 4 persons two a table, and enough room to comfortably accommodate 16 people.

You mentioned that the room is equipped with a laptop, projector, and screen. Participants will also need writing materials. a USB key, and one flip-chart per table. We will be bringing our own camera.

qualifications
Our facilitators offer over 20 years’ training experience with expertise and accreditation in adult education principles, business, and interpersonal communication skills.

costs
The needs assessment is free. The cost for the training, including tailoring materials and exercises to participant’s experiences, material painting and coping, 2-day interactive facilitation, workshop eval. sheet and summary, and written best-practices recommendations specific to your organization, is 6000 plus GST.

Again, thank you for your interest and consider. At your convenience, please call or email me about your proposed employee training.

Kimberly Dohickery

Kimberly Dohickery
Employment Counsellor

1 answer

Here's the proofread version of your document with the corrections highlighted. Let’s go through the errors and revisions.


March 1st, 2019 (corrected date format)

Jessica Quach, President
Employment Vocational Training
238 Nelson Road
Scarborough, Ontario, H4K 1M9 (added a comma for proper address formatting)

To Whom It May Concern, (capitalized and corrected salutation)

Thank you for considering We Help - Tutoring Services for your training needs. Based on our conversation last Friday, I am pleased to propose the preliminary outline of the customer service workshop. I have also included a brochure with these details. (capitalization and punctuation corrections)

Workshop Overview
The 2-day Customer Service Strategist workshop encourages participants to define and refine their superior customer service skills. During the workshop, participants will: (clarified wording & added colon)

• Begin with ice-breaker, self-assessment, and goal-setting exercises
• Role-play active listening, questioning, and problem-solving strategies (removed "of")
• Analyze and identify excellent customer service attitudes and behaviors (capitalized “Analyze” and corrected "behaviours" to "behaviors" for consistency)
• Identify and apply three conflict negotiation models (corrected "or tree" to "three")
• Articulate best-practice behaviors as the organizational standard (corrected “best-practices” to “best-practice”)
• Set a goal for further development

Depending on participants’ preferences, we can begin at 8:00 AM or 8:30 AM and finish at 4:00 PM or 4:30 PM. I’ve attached a proposed agenda for your approval.

Methods
Using a variety of interactive exercises, including case analysis, taped role-play, peer feedback, and self-assessment, your employees will review, describe, and apply behaviors that build customer relationships. (corrected "pear" to "peer" and "building" to "build")

Since customized content contributes to learning transfer, I would like to visit your location for a few hours to observe your service representatives before the training dates. This complimentary needs assessment will allow me to gather information about current practices and to see your training facilities. (corrected "allowed" to "allow” and "locations" to "location")

Resources
As we discussed, your employees will need uninterrupted time to review and practice customer service techniques. Because participants will be working together and moving around, they will need group seating—4 persons to a table—and enough room to comfortably accommodate 16 people. (corrected "you" to "your"; replaced comma with an em dash for clarity)

You mentioned that the room is equipped with a laptop, projector, and screen. Participants will also need writing materials, a USB key, and one flip chart per table. We will be bringing our own camera. (added commas)

Qualifications
Our facilitators offer over 20 years of training experience with expertise and accreditation in adult education principles, business, and interpersonal communication skills. (corrected "20 years’" to "20 years of")

Costs
The needs assessment is free. The cost for the training, including tailoring materials and exercises to participants’ experiences, material printing and copying, 2-day interactive facilitation, workshop evaluation sheet and summary, and written best-practice recommendations specific to your organization, is $6,000 plus GST. (corrected "participant’s" to "participants’", "painting and coping" to "printing and copying", and added formatting to the dollar amount)

Again, thank you for your interest and consideration. At your convenience, please call or email me about your proposed employee training.

Kimberly Dohickery

Employment Counsellor


Make sure to review and finalize the formatting on your document in the correct application, and submit it with Track Changes or highlighting enabled, as specified in your instructions.