Many people supported Franklin Roosevelt’s New Deal policies. However, some individuals, such as Huey P. Long, criticized his policies, and the Supreme Court declared some unconstitutional. If you had lived during the Great Depression, would you have supported Roosevelt’s policies or criticized them? Why?

Question

If I had lived in the Great Depression, I would have criticized Roosevelt's policies. In 3.3.4 it says "Many New Deal policies directly helped ease the suffering of Americans. However, these programs cost a lot of money, and Roosevelt was not as successful in addressing the nation’s growing deficit. "
A recession struck when Roosevelt reduced spending. All of a sudden, industrial production fell by a third and unemployment increased by 5%, leaving two million Americans without jobs. Banks got ready to close, and breadlines reappeared.
Both liberals and conservatives voiced strong opposition to the New Deal. Many conservatives believed it to be a radical agenda that would undermine the nation's system of free business.
Roosevelt's character was attacked by groups of wealthy Americans and industrialists who disagreed with his policies. He was shifting toward socialism and fascism, according to others, and away from American principles. These concerns were echoed by several conservative Democrats. They were concerned that additional New Deal initiatives would jeopardize democracy itself.

how should i alter this?
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Answer 1

Your response presents a clear viewpoint and includes well-reasoned arguments. However, to enhance clarity and coherence, you may want to make the following alterations:

1. Clarify Your Thesis: Open with a stronger thesis statement that explicitly states your position. Instead of saying "I would have criticized Roosevelt's policies," you might say, "If I had lived during the Great Depression, I would have been critical of Roosevelt's New Deal policies due to their fiscal implications and perceptions of shifting American values."

2. Organize Your Arguments: Break your response into clear sections that each support your thesis. For example, you could have one paragraph focused on the economic implications of the New Deal, another on the political and social backlash it faced, and a concluding statement.

3. Use Evidence Effectively: When referencing specific points (like the recession and its effects), provide a bit more context to show the direct connection to your thesis.

4. Engage with Counterarguments: Acknowledge the positive aspects of the New Deal policies and explain why you believe the negatives outweigh these.

5. Conclude Strongly: End with a strong conclusion that summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance.

Here’s a revised version of your argument:

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If I had lived during the Great Depression, I would have been critical of Roosevelt's New Deal policies due to their fiscal implications and potential erosion of American principles. While it is undeniable that many New Deal programs provided much-needed relief to suffering Americans, they came at a significant financial cost. As mentioned in 3.3.4, Roosevelt's focus on expansionary policies led to a growing national deficit, which became evident when a recession struck after he attempted to reduce government spending. This decision resulted in a drastic fall in industrial production and a spike in unemployment, leaving millions of Americans in dire circumstances once again.

Additionally, the New Deal faced strong opposition from both liberals and conservatives. Many conservatives viewed it as a radical agenda that threatened the foundations of free enterprise and capitalism. Detractors, including affluent Americans and industrialists, accused Roosevelt of steering the country toward socialism and fascism, which they argued undermined core American democratic values. This concern echoed among conservative Democrats who feared that further New Deal measures could jeopardize the very democracy the country was founded upon.

In light of these factors, I would argue that while the New Deal aimed to address urgent economic challenges, its long-term implications on fiscal policy and American democracy were troubling enough to merit criticism.

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This structure makes your argument clearer and easier to follow while effectively addressing multiple facets of the debate surrounding the New Deal.