Question

When considering the extent that Tolkien borrows the characters,objects and events from the ancient myths, there are a variety of evidences that Tolkien uses the elements of heroism, the precious treasure and the retaliation to create the fantasy story, The Hobbit.

is this sentence right?how to improve this?

Not having read Tolkien, I cannot comment about the content of your sentence. The only comment I have regarding the writing is that you need to get that last comma in the two series you have written:

"characters, objects, and events"
and
"the elements of heroism, the precious treasure, and the retaliation" (<~~better to delete the second and third instances of "the" also)
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/commas.htm

And be sure to underline the book's title.

=)