Asked by Anonymous
Do agree with my answer? Also, is it grammatically correct?
This question regards the short-story "One Ordinary Day, With Peanuts" by Shirely Jackson.
1. Is this the sort of wife you would have imagined for Mr. Johnson, based on your impressions of his personality up to that point? Explain.
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes, from sending three dogs to the pound, to accusing a woman of shoplifting and having “the store detective pick her up” (430), to getting a bus driver fired. In other words, she appears to be the complete, utter opposite of Mr. Johnson.
This question regards the short-story "One Ordinary Day, With Peanuts" by Shirely Jackson.
1. Is this the sort of wife you would have imagined for Mr. Johnson, based on your impressions of his personality up to that point? Explain.
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes, from sending three dogs to the pound, to accusing a woman of shoplifting and having “the store detective pick her up” (430), to getting a bus driver fired. In other words, she appears to be the complete, utter opposite of Mr. Johnson.
Answers
Answered by
Writeacher
I haven't read this, so I can't comment on content.
1. This is FAR too long for one sentence. How can you revise so no meaning is lost, but it's divided into 3 or so sentences?
<i>This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes, from sending three dogs to the pound, to accusing a woman of shoplifting and having “the store detective pick her up” (430), to getting a bus driver fired.</i>
2. You should remove the comma and "utter" after complete. It's repetitive (redundant) and unneeded.
1. This is FAR too long for one sentence. How can you revise so no meaning is lost, but it's divided into 3 or so sentences?
<i>This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes, from sending three dogs to the pound, to accusing a woman of shoplifting and having “the store detective pick her up” (430), to getting a bus driver fired.</i>
2. You should remove the comma and "utter" after complete. It's repetitive (redundant) and unneeded.
Answered by
Anonymous
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes. In other words, she appears to be the complete opposite of Mr. Johnson. Therefore, I never would have imagined a person such as herself to be his wife.
Answered by
Writeacher
Ahhh, but you deleted some good details! How can you keep those details in, but not all in one sentence?
Answered by
Anonymous
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes. For example, she sends three dogs to the pound, accuses a woman of shoplifting and has “the store detective pick her up” (430). She even gets a bus driver fired. In other words, she appears to be the complete opposite of Mr. Johnson. Therefore, I never would have imagined a person such as herself to be his wife.
Answered by
Writeacher
Much better. Those details are excellent to include!
Answered by
Anonymous
Thank you!
Answered by
Writeacher
One more thing ...
... I never would have imagined a person such as her to be his wife.
(Since the subject of that sentence is "I," it's incorrect to use the reflexive form of a different pronoun. Reflexives are used to refer to the subject of a sentence.)
... I never would have imagined a person such as her to be his wife.
(Since the subject of that sentence is "I," it's incorrect to use the reflexive form of a different pronoun. Reflexives are used to refer to the subject of a sentence.)
Answered by
Anonymous
What would you suggest, then?
Answered by
Anonymous
What do you thin about this?
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes. For example, Mrs. Johnson sends three dogs to the pound, accuses a woman of shoplifting and tells “the store detective [to] pick her up” (430). She even gets a bus driver fired. In other words, Mrs. Johnson is the complete opposite of Mr. Johnson. Therefore, I never would have imagined a person like her to be his wife.
A: This is certainly not the sort of wife I would have imagined for Mr. Johnson as Mrs. Johnson seems to be a rather bad –tempered, accusing, and hostile person, bringing destruction wherever she goes. For example, Mrs. Johnson sends three dogs to the pound, accuses a woman of shoplifting and tells “the store detective [to] pick her up” (430). She even gets a bus driver fired. In other words, Mrs. Johnson is the complete opposite of Mr. Johnson. Therefore, I never would have imagined a person like her to be his wife.
Answered by
Anonymous
Correction: What do you think about this?
Answered by
Writeacher
Very good. I think you're done!
=)
=)
Answered by
Writeacher
You're welcome!
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