I would usually just use the first, but sometimes the second one, especially if I were in a large place that was unfamiliar to me.
The phrase "the restroom" usually is generic, but can be specific if, for example, you were in someone's home.
The third one would most likely be used in someone else's home, but not in a large building, such as a school or store.
1. Where is the restroom?
2. Where is a restroom?
[Can we use both expression? Do you use only #1? Does the restroom mean the specific restroom? Or is 'the restroom' in generic use? Or does the restroom mean the specific restroom near here, which people know?]
3. Where can I wash my hands?
[Can we use this sentence in another person's house or apartment? Can we also use this sentence when we are in a department store or at school?]
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